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the backyard-blacktie-bash...

It was a day that was planned long ago. 
Like a planned ending to a fairy tale. 
 I know, fairy tale's aren't planned but you know this girl...
It was planned. 
Details. Color pallet for guests. Gold silverware and bold linens.
Oh yes! It was planned. 

We just knew we had the perfect cake topper to our perfect evening. 
The perfect little present to continue this celebration. 
It was all so glorious. 
Not all heart warming things are planned. 
Some in fact steal your heart-
like a thief in the night.
3 days before this glorious day, my heart was taken.
My heart was broken. My heart devastated.

Our world came crashing down. Hard.
I had a miscarriage with our little boy at 16 weeks. 
In that short amount of time he stole our hearts. 
Crazy. Unthinkable. Undeniably.

Why? Why? Why? 
That's all I could think.
 And again why?

No one knows. No one will ever have answers. 
Everything "happens for a reason" just doesn't seem to cut it either.
Nor will it ever make sense.

The music continues to play. 
The sun continues to shine. 
  And most importantly our family continues to love. 

While this gathering now seemed to come at the worst time-
Coupled with the worst news at what was supposed to be the most fabulous time,
we still had to celebrate.
Confusing, I know. 
And now I was confused. 

It was now less than 2 days away. 
Rentals, Flowers, Food, Flights. Friends. Family.
Everything was in order.

After tears...
lots of them.
Crocodile silent ones.
Uncontrollable breathing ones.
Nobody is seeing these ones, ones.

We gained our strength from each other.
We held back tears as we held hands and welcomed our friends and family to this celebration. 

We loved.
We smiled.
We hugged.
We ate.
We drank.
We danced. 

It's was a celebration of life.
OUR life.
Just as the fairly tale was planned.

A better late than never post
and look into our
backyard, black tie, beer donkey bash with the ones we love most.

If you have been along for our wild ride thus far,
you will know that 
hip, heart, home, hitched, heartache
speaks volumes for us,
 but our love has prevailed all these things. 

And this is just the beginning...


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